Working all the live long day.

After a hard work week of tricking kids into good oral hygiene I decided to take Saturday off. Completely off, like I was in my PJ's until 6 PM. Naturally I used this time wisely to catch up on some VH1 (for the record, I do not believe that Brett Micheals will EVER find love on a tour bus. If he couldn't find it in a mansion or make it work with "the Frenchie" he should be alone forever). What really intrigued me was this "The Pick Up Artist 2" (A reality show where 3 "mentors" try to turn good guys into smooth operators. Smooth operators who can pick up chicks. Each week one good guy is kicked off the show for his lack of "skills".) marathon. I couldn't decide which of the following three things offended me the most about this reality show.
1. The shows main man, "Mystery". Ok, not so much "Mystery" the man, but for sure "Mystery's" wardrobe. Like I am supposed to believe that a guy who wears top hats and floor length coats trimmed in fur knows anything about "picking up" chicks? Plus "Mystery" is Canadian.
2. "Mystery" actually does know how to pick up chicks! So many episodes "Mystery" and his side kick "Matador" give the contestants advice that really works. While the pick up artist experts are outlining the game plan for the fellas I start out skeptical. "Yeah right that would work" to only be thinking ashamedly two minutes later "I totally would fall for that" or "I have fallen for that".
3. "Mystery" has a whole pick up girls language. He has a lingo that you HAVE to know if you want to be a real pick up artist. I guess the new lingo is where the actual art of the pick up happens. Here are a couple of my favourite pick up definitions.
Gambit=Conversation Starter
Niquito=Chick Magnet
Thread=Line of Conversation
Here's an example on how to use all three "Ok, Niquito tell a gambit and after a minute check the thread. If the story isn't working with this babe we'll bounce".
While I will admit "Mystery" was able to turn some of these zeros into real hero's I just can't put my full heart into backing this particular reality show, but good try VH1.